Well...I DID NOT Expect THIS to Happen!

 
Phentermine Day 1
 

  Whelp it's been a little over a year since my last entry, and it's been quite a roller coaster ride to say the least!  I had reached a point just within the last week where I felt I was at my wits end not knowing which direction to take regarding my current weight situation.  I gained ALL my weight back AND THEN SOME!  Directing back to the title post...I DID NOT expect THIS to happen!! Things were going fairly well with my exercise regimen with me often times exercising twice a day.  I managed to bring my weight down to 177 pounds and even found the courage to put on a bathing suit Summer 2012--  a one piece of course. We planned a family summer vacation and even though my weight had crept up to the early 180s, I managed to sort of maintain.

Family Vacation Summer 2012, 183lbs
 

I wasn't in the best of health due to female medical issues, but I kept pressing.  I felt more confident and had a sense of relief returning back to school that Fall. Having passed all my teacher certification exams, I now felt that I had a better handle and would be less likely to indulge in the so called emotional eating.  Looking back, I remember feeling all mellow and collected in the below pictures haha!!  There I was, ready to start my 5th year of teaching and now had a little bit of experience under my belt.  My classroom was clean and organized, and I was ready to begin a new school year!  I should've known better because Murphy's Law was in full effect and things went downhill from there!

Few Days Prior to the Start of the 2012-13 School Year

 

 

First day of school, and I was having problems with my vehicle engine!  I thought taking it to a local mechanic instead of the dealership would save me money.  Wrong!  Paid for the so-called repairs and continued to have problems.  I ended up taking it to the dealership, and ended up paying 3 times the amount of the given estimate.  Live and learn I guess, but the emotional eating had been triggered.  That beginning of the school year "honeymoon" period where students are somewhat behaved didn't last long either, so having to deal with behavior issues started brewing.  Even though the stressful week and a half dealing with my vehicle and being out of nearly $900 dollars, I thought the worst was behind me until....

Damage Resulting from Water Heater, September 2012



Our upstairs water heater busted and flooded our entire downstairs living area.  It happened late that night and was a total nightmare!  The carpets, ceilings, lesson plan materials, etc were all ruined.  I had to call 911 because my husband and neighbor couldn't locate the water shut off valve.  Watching the water gush from the ceilings and indoor light fixtures had me certain someone was going to get electrocuted that night.  Once the firemen left and the arrangements were made with the insurance company, the emotional eating was in full swing!  I was completely overwhelmed.  I no longer had time to exercise, and my new focus became dealing with the damage and searching for qualified repairmen.  One thing is for certain is that LIFE DID NOT STOP!  We were constantly on the go and always exhausted. 

 

 

Throw in a couple of classroom altercations, middle school drama with my own children, emergency room visit after passing out, various personal drama issues that both affected me directly and indirectly, and living in a home/disaster area my stress levels shot through the roof! The holidays and all the binge eating that entails didn't help either.  My coping skills were sub par, which I believe led me to make some very poor choices regarding my physical health and mental health well being.  I became very reclusive and was always irritable.

 

 



The 2013 New Year was ushered in with poor eating habits.  I had to pull the larger sized clothing from the back of my closet because I could no longer fit into my smaller sized clothing.  Even though I attempted to exercise during the 2 week winter break, it was impossible because we had the first Christmas Day snow in decades and was without electricity for days!  I then ended up having to have a medical procedure late January 2013, but promised myself that I would lose the nearly 15 pounds I had gained once I recovered.  I was trying to remain optimistic and monitor my food intake, but my weight kept creeping!  I researched to see if it had anything to do with my medical procedure.  I came across numerous online forums filled with women who had the same medical procedure and was seeking answers regarding the same weight gain I was experiencing.  The doctor's office informed me that it had nothing to do with the procedure because it shouldn't have interfered with my hormones, but I was convinced it did.  I continued to gain weight each week.  Midway thru March 2013 I had reached 195 lbs.  My intent was to finally refocus and use the picture shown above as my "before" picture convincing myself I'd have the weight lost by the summer.  I indicated the days on my calendar when I exercised and continued to monitor my intake, but I STILL CONTINUED TO GAIN WEIGHT.  Friends said it was due to my age, but I thought it was related to the surgery.  Looking back, I don't know.   All I knew was that I needed to get a handle on it and fast!

Spring Break March 18, 2013

 

 

Late Spring 2013, 200+ lbs

 



Spring was here and my weight reached the 200s.  I was devastated and depressed.  How could this happen??  One of my students slipped my IPhone off my desk and snapped my picture (obnoxious thing to do, I know), but I wasn't happy with my ever expanding waistline shown in the photograph.  Again, trying to remain optimistic I convinced myself  I'd refocus come summer.  Despite my 5 day a week exercise regimen I STILL CONTINUED TO GAIN WEIGHT!  The endless research, frustration, irritatability, avoiding social activities, and depression all got the best of me.  I tried to wait visiting my doctor until my scheduled annual OB/GYN visit, but I couldn't any longer.

First week in July- One Week before starting Phentermine

 

I let him know I was gaining weight pretty much on a weekly basis and was not showing any signs of letting up!  That week alone it had increased to nearly 5lbs! I explained my frustration and shared my exercise regimen with my doctor who did what I thought was unthinkable.  He wrote me a prescription for the weight loss medication Phentermine. When I gave birth to my 2nd son a little over a decade ago, I asked for a prescription weight loss medication to speed up my efforts.  He refused because he didn't feel comfortable with the side effects knowing I was under his care.  He's had a change of heart I guess.  I am relieved to say that I've lost 6 lbs since visiting my doctor 4 days ago!  The medication also affects the serotonin and dopamine in the brain, so along with suppressing my appetite it's also elevated my moods.  I have all this nonstop energy and I'm definitely not as moody.  The side effects (dry mouth and insomnia/anxiety) are somewhat of a nuisance, but I can learn to live with them if I continue with these results.  Today was my first day exercising since taking the medication, and it's definitely helped with that 3AM anxiety/insomia edge I'm experiencing since starting the meds.  The medication is meant for only short term as they lose their effectiveness over time.  I'm reading stories how the weight came back with a vengeance to those who didn't develop better eating habits, so I'm praying the same doesn't happen to me if I do lose the weight.

I never thought I'd be happy to say my current weight is 200 pounds, but I hope to share some photos of my progessive weightloss efforts.  God bless.

Quarter Annual Weigh-In and Measure-In

6-2-12 

Starting Weight: 195?

Current Weight: 183

Goal Weight: 155-160

I have to confess that I'm somewhat disappointed because I've yet to learn full discipline while on this weight loss journey.  Even though I see the progress when comparing photos from the past few months and years, I've yet to control the bad eating habits.  I shouldn't beat myself up too bad b/c I've eliminated the Starbucks, Fast Food, and excessive fried foods.  I've just yet to learn to control the STRESS and PMS eating binges.  Flip side is that despite a few setbacks with soreness and strains, I've been fully committed to my exercise regimen.  I'm noticing my body's toning and defining, plus I'm liking what I see!

Still, I'm feeling a little disappointed maybe indifference regarding my progress or lack thereof.  I tried to not focus on the scale, but rather the inches.  Since my last weigh-in/measure-in on March 3, 2012 my weight is the EXACT SAME!  I've lost a half inch from my bust, abdomen, and a quarter inch from the hip.  I'm showing inches gained in my calves and biceps which is fine because I've been lifting weights. 

The real issue is that I need to limit my sugar intake.  I'm noticing the increase of sugary drinks and snacks purchased each week from the grocery store.  I'm now out for summer break so maybe I can focus more and be active and hopefully not find myself inactive! Once again, I've stopped counting calories and think I'll probably need to resume, ugh. 

Insatiable Appetite

Ugh my hungry appetite has been off the charts!  I even made a special trip today to purchase the most sinful cookie in town @ Blvd. Bread Company!  Ugh, I'm mad at myself but it was sooooo good!  I'm aware of my reasons for doing so, but I've got to get a handle on it!  I'm here at work, it's not even time for lunch, and I've already eaten breakfast PLUS my afternoon & afterschool snacks.  I have been exercising which is a plus, and also have been thinking about modifying some things.  My usual routine consist of treadmill cardio and weight lifting the usual selection of machines.  Gonna try changing things up during the month of June, and then alternate machine selections each month.  I'm not quite ready to trade up the treadmill for the eliptical machine, but I maybe willing to do so further down the road.  I've gotten comfortable with the exercise machines I use, so I'll change things up to see if it'll aid in my weightloss and toning efforts.  Can't wait to see if any inches were lost since I last recorded them in March!  If I continue behaving the way I have been today, there will be no change!  :-(

Still At It....

177.5 lbs. 5-5-12

Well, I'm still going strong with my exercise regimen.  I'm at the point where I'm miserable when I don't work out.  It feels good fitting into clothes that were tucked away in my closet, and it finally feels great to shop!!!  I still have a ways to go, but I've accepted that it's a process that won't happen overnight.  The school year is drawing to a close and I'm ready for summer break.  I'll need to ensure that I stick with my regimen since I recently had to switch gyms.  My old beloved gym that I'd been a member for 10 years (more off than on lol) closed it's doors last week.  It was always a great match for me because it provided childcare.  Right towards the end, I became a faithful member but by then it was too late.  So I've been comparison shopping other gyms around town and think I found one that'll work for me. This one doesn't have childcare, but it has other perks. My biggest struggle was finding one that had the exact same equipment that I built around my 1 hour 15 current regimen. My current regimen includes:

Tues-Friday

30 minutes treadmill

2 reps of 25 torso rotation machine

2 reps of 25 rotary torso machine

4 reps of 25 crunches

25 reps of tricep press machine

25 reps seated press machine

25 reps pullover (abs) machine

25 reps leg extension machine

25 reps seated leg press machine

25 reps hip abductor (inner leg) machine

25 reps hip abductor (outer leg) machine

10 minutes treadmill

Saturday

3 mile jog

Target Areas

183 lbs. 3-03-12

First off, please excuse the hair and lack of makeup. Good part about that was that I had just finished working out yay me! I was feeling discouraged because my weightloss efforts seemed to be at a standstill. Some mornings when I had stepped onto the scale, a pound or two of weight GAIN was reflected! Now, I'll admit that I don't always stay within my daily allowed caloric intake, but I've stuck with my fairly intense 5 day a week/1 hour a day workout regimen. So why the weightgain?

Well, I've read a few articles that I should focus more on the inches rather than the scale. In the past, I've focused only on the scale. Well, today I found my measuring tape and measured my bust, waist, abdomen, hip, upper thigh, mid thigh, biceps, knee, and calf. I then remembered that last summer while drafting and constructing my clothing design, I had recorded my body measurements. I compared them with my current measurements and it was a relief seeing the number of inches lost! I wish I had recorded my measurements when I restarted regimen December 2011.

I guess at this point that in addition to recording my daily weight, I'll record my body measurements at the end of each quarter (March, June, September, December) to measure progress.

The orange circles on my picture are areas I want to target and tone-- the flab under my arms, my chubby face, waist, abdomen, back fat, and inner thighs. I like the size and shape of my legs so I want to keep the weight there, but I need to tone up those inner thighs. Same goes for my hips. I think it's so attractive to see a toned shapely woman and a woman with hips and then some-- really exudes feminity IMO.

Well I'm going to not beat myself up by focusing on that scale and will just keep on keeping on!

I Miss You Old Friends

Dear Size 10 and Size 12 Clothing,

Hey old friends long time, no see. It's been a while since we last connected, but I haven't forgotten about you. Honestly, I think about you quite often and the days we spent together for what seams like forever ago (pun intended). We were such a perfect fit but had somewhat lost touch (pun again intended). There's no excuse, but I started hanging with the wrong crowd...Starbucks, cheeseburgers, milkshakes, oreo pies, cupcakes, fried foods, chips, etc. The comfort they provided was what I thought was needed, but ironically the satisfying feeling left me feeling empty.

I'm hoping we can rekindle our relationship and reconnect soon. I'm looking forward to a possible Spring 2012 reunion. I miss you and hope we'll never lose touch.

Hopefully,

Latiste

Happy Belated Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year, Valentines, etc, etc.!

181 lbs. 2-22-12

It's been a good while since my last post because I had gotten myself in a terrible rut where only a vacation could get me out of it! Yep, the holidays and work stress had gotten the best of me and I saw my weight hit 197 lbs. early December 2011.

Once again, I made my mind up start an exercise regimen during my 2 week Christmas break --The joys of working in a public school! It was tough starting out because I would set my alarm for 5:00 AM, but the upside was that I was able to take mid-day naps if I necessary.

I gotta admit I feel great. Everything in my life isn't always peachy keen, but I'm dealing with stress times better. I resorted back to counting calories as well. I counted for about the first month and a half, but stopped because I thought I had a handle on things since I was exercising daily. Well, I noticed my weight came to a stand still so I decided to continue counting and it does help with my discipline. I'm so, so ready to reach my goal weight. Meanwhile I'm having fun working towards it and shopping for smaller sized clothing!!